I am going to try something different. Most of the articles – all brilliant, by the way – on The Shankly Way are focusing on particular subjects; our calamitous goalkeeper, in form midfielders, injuries and so on. I am going against the establishment – I am rebelling.
This weekly blog will give you all an insight in to the inner workings of my mind. A brain dump of all the thoughts that go through my mind – you don’t know me, you can’t get me sectioned. Interspersed with the madness of the Bloggelaar, I will still be contributing to the site under a veil of intellect but don’t be fooled, readers/fans.
The Bloggelaar will have answers to all your questions about Liverpool Football Club – I cannot promise that these answers will be based in any way on facts nor can I promise they will be questions you thought you wanted answering.
I will tackle the important issues such as Roberto Firmino’s haircut and why on earth noodles are being served in the renovated Main Stand. Now, make yourself comfortable and I shall begin.
Firstly, let me address the elephant in the room – “Bloggelaar”. Yes, I know, brilliant name. For those missing the hilarious pun, this is a blog, a Liverpool FC blog and we had a goalkeeper in the 80’s/90’s called Bruce Grobbelaar… Hence, Bloggelaar. I toyed with alternatives like Adam Blogdan and David N’Blog but Bloggelaar felt right.
I went to the opening of the new Main Stand. A free exhibition for fans. A nice gesture. It is an amazing beast; it looks amazing and allows more of us to go and support the boys. There have been teething problems though.
The first game saw no water in the upper tier toilets. A clever way to reduce the Anfield carbon footprint although I think it was blamed on poor water pressure.
They ran out of hotdogs and draught beer too, we were lucky there were no riots – a refined bunch us Reds fans, clearly. I have been in the Gods for a couple of games now.
Both times I have come close to having a coronary (I need to get my lazy arse back in the gym) but, I have to say, the view is pretty good from up there. The atmosphere is surprisingly good too.
I don’t doubt the fans but, the miserable old guard who used to reside in the old Main Stand have now been diluted by young excitement. It is nice.
They gave us a new menu too – albeit for 2 games. I saw we had Salt and Pepper Chicken but, if you ask for it, you are met with blank looks. They do actually have noodles though… NOODLES! I have an issue with that. The only food options at a football stadium should be pies, burgers, hot dogs and Guinness.
I should explain, I like to complain about anything and everything. I make no apologies for this. Deal with it you fascist.
So, Bobby had a haircut. Thank god. That top knot was embarrassing. I wish it disappeared when his holiday weight vanished.
He came back to preseason overweight and I slated him for it – he needs to keep himself svelte, it is me that can get fat (and may I add, I have done it very well). Despite that, he is my player of the season so far, he has been outstanding.
Him and Adam Lallana have been excellent and run themselves in to the ground for the team.
And may I say, what fantastic teeth Bobby has now. He has had the full Rylan treatment with a cracking set of Hampsteads (Hampstead Heath – teeth). Ridiculous haircut, ridiculous teeth, ridiculously talented. I love you, Mr. Firmino.
The final subject for this week is aimed at those who don’t know about Liverpool or don’t know about football.
I want to try and give an analogy of what it means to be a football fan and what it means to be a Liverpool fan. I am often asked what possesses me to spend so much money on going to watch the Reds.
I get asked why I subject myself to it, why I let myself get angry about a game – utter the phrase “it is just a game” and I will not be held responsible for your impending demise – why I travel north, south, east and west to sit in the cold and wet.
It is difficult to explain. Football is just a way of life. It’s like Marmite – you either love it or hate it. I started playing at 7 and have loved the game ever since. I got my first Liverpool shirt at about the same time and they are my team.
I guess the closest explanation to being a Liverpool fan is like when you got your first car. It may not be special to everyone, but it is to you. There will be times when it lets you down but you still drive it.
People may tell you “it is just a car” but it is more than that to you, you have an affinity with that car. I guess what I am trying to get at is that you don’t necessarily choose to love football, you don’t choose to love Liverpool; it just, happens.
We haven’t had much to scream and shout about recently but we are all still in this for those moments that no one can touch or shoot down – last season we had Dortmund and we had a fun day out at Wembley (I may share some stories of that day in future Bloggelaar’s). We all want the same thing. We all want our happy ending.
The intention is for the weekly Bloggelaar to come out before our games so I can give a prediction. My prediction is my prediction will be very wrong. I would like to think of the Bloggelaar as interactive so any topics you want me to give me opinions on, please comment on the post and I will give my thoughts in the next edition.
Amidst the serious blogs which are highly enjoyable to read, why not read the ramblings of a twenty something opinionated bloke from the Midlands? Let me be your guilty pleasure, you naughty little thing!
Written by @AndyBraders